Shameful performance-enhancing behavior at NAF tournaments
Posted: Fri May 20, 2016 9:44 am
Like many NAF Coaches, I enjoy an honest, refreshing glass of beer or six at tournaments. It's part of the game and improves everybody's experience.
But some hypercompetitive coaches, obviously trying to squeeze out every last possible advantage, seem to have taken to the underhanded tactic of playing sober. Worse, some tournament organizers turn a blind eye to this behavior, or even passively encourage it by scheduling tournaments in locations with slow or nonexistent bar staff.
So long as this is tolerated, honest beer-swilling coaches are at a competitive disadvantage. Currently at most tournaments, drinkers are forced to either accept that disadvantage, or sometimes feel pressure to cheat by moderating their own drinking! With all of the health problems associated with excessive sobriety, such as high blood pressure, taking double skulls seriously, or shaky hands knocking over carefully painted figures.
Is this the kind of tournament scene that we want to encourage? Of course not!
My suggestion is to establish a Blood Bowl Pro-Doping Organization. Members would perform randomized breathalyzer tests at tournaments; coaches found to have an insufficient BAC would face consequences ranging from a funnel of cheap beer (for first-time or accidental offenders) to shots of vodka for egregious or repeat offenders.
Common excuses for failing to drink sufficiently (Sober-cheating), such as "I have to drive home after this!" or "I just don't like drinking, sorry" or "I'm below the legal drinking age" or "Get away from me, you drunken creep!" should be investigated and, if found to have merit, some alternative sanction should be considered to cancel out their inherent advantage.
Are any of the current Tournament Director candidates willing to take a stand on this very important issue?
But some hypercompetitive coaches, obviously trying to squeeze out every last possible advantage, seem to have taken to the underhanded tactic of playing sober. Worse, some tournament organizers turn a blind eye to this behavior, or even passively encourage it by scheduling tournaments in locations with slow or nonexistent bar staff.
So long as this is tolerated, honest beer-swilling coaches are at a competitive disadvantage. Currently at most tournaments, drinkers are forced to either accept that disadvantage, or sometimes feel pressure to cheat by moderating their own drinking! With all of the health problems associated with excessive sobriety, such as high blood pressure, taking double skulls seriously, or shaky hands knocking over carefully painted figures.
Is this the kind of tournament scene that we want to encourage? Of course not!
My suggestion is to establish a Blood Bowl Pro-Doping Organization. Members would perform randomized breathalyzer tests at tournaments; coaches found to have an insufficient BAC would face consequences ranging from a funnel of cheap beer (for first-time or accidental offenders) to shots of vodka for egregious or repeat offenders.
Common excuses for failing to drink sufficiently (Sober-cheating), such as "I have to drive home after this!" or "I just don't like drinking, sorry" or "I'm below the legal drinking age" or "Get away from me, you drunken creep!" should be investigated and, if found to have merit, some alternative sanction should be considered to cancel out their inherent advantage.
Are any of the current Tournament Director candidates willing to take a stand on this very important issue?