THUG TANK - Goon Squad Orc Blog - 29 (Semi Final)

Every team has a story. If you want to tell the BB world yours, then this is the place to do it.

Moderator: TFF Mods

User avatar
bouf
Friend of Bumblef**k
Posts: 1198
Joined: Sun Feb 04, 2007 7:56 am
Location: Brisbane
Contact:

Post by bouf »

Hey guys, thanks for the support!

Just so you know, I'm out of town on business... I will write my report as soon as I get back. The Goons haven't forgotten their fans! ;)

Reason: ''
~ bouf - Find me on Board Game Geek
Or find me on YouTube!
Image
MyKi#1
Super Star
Super Star
Posts: 1015
Joined: Mon Jul 21, 2008 9:02 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Post by MyKi#1 »

Well as long as the Goons know how much their fans support them maybe they should try again next season? :wink: :P

MyKi

Reason: ''
Back 2 Back Ausbowl Wooden Spooner!
Mad Mö
Experienced
Experienced
Posts: 68
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2009 4:33 pm

Post by Mad Mö »

"Orkses is never defeated in battle. If we win we win, if we die we die fighting so it don't count. If we runs for it we don't die neither, cos we can come back for annuver go, see!"

Reason: ''
Skarsnikk
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 225
Joined: Wed Jul 05, 2006 4:58 pm
Location: Cheltenham, UK

Post by Skarsnikk »

We're still here for the Goons, and at least they're making progress! :D

Reason: ''
For now I shall be a proud and mentally impaired player who apparently shares the same intelligence level of that of a chimp. Now if you would excuse me I have pressing matters to attend to, I have found a stick and I am going to poke a banana.
Skarsnikk
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 225
Joined: Wed Jul 05, 2006 4:58 pm
Location: Cheltenham, UK

Post by Skarsnikk »

Oh and things are looking good for their third place, as they appear to be facing a Asgard Raiders team, without a few key players, including their Snow Troll!

Go Goons!!!!!

Reason: ''
For now I shall be a proud and mentally impaired player who apparently shares the same intelligence level of that of a chimp. Now if you would excuse me I have pressing matters to attend to, I have found a stick and I am going to poke a banana.
Skarsnikk
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 225
Joined: Wed Jul 05, 2006 4:58 pm
Location: Cheltenham, UK

Post by Skarsnikk »

Gooooo Goooons!!!!!

Third place in the bag an Biff is truely a god!

Well done Bouf on a great season :D

Reason: ''
For now I shall be a proud and mentally impaired player who apparently shares the same intelligence level of that of a chimp. Now if you would excuse me I have pressing matters to attend to, I have found a stick and I am going to poke a banana.
MyKi#1
Super Star
Super Star
Posts: 1015
Joined: Mon Jul 21, 2008 9:02 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Post by MyKi#1 »

Well done bouf you got your goals although BaBBL champs would have been better but 3rd place is better than 4th and the Asgards have to deal with being 4th.... As for Biffs legend status, he is a legend now yes? not some Lou Richards of the Gridiron? :lol: ...

What was the final scores of both games played tonight?

GO GOOOOOONS! Goons for BaBBL 5 champions.

:D MyKi

Reason: ''
Back 2 Back Ausbowl Wooden Spooner!
MyKi#1
Super Star
Super Star
Posts: 1015
Joined: Mon Jul 21, 2008 9:02 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Post by MyKi#1 »

And season 5 sees the return of the great green machine Biff Shatterjaws and the rocky mountain goon squad..... You can do it Bouf, Goons to smash all in their path and win the BABBL and Rotgut cups.

GO GOONS.

MyKi

Reason: ''
Back 2 Back Ausbowl Wooden Spooner!
User avatar
bouf
Friend of Bumblef**k
Posts: 1198
Joined: Sun Feb 04, 2007 7:56 am
Location: Brisbane
Contact:

Post by bouf »

Goons in the Soup!

Well as most of the Goon Fans already know, the Goons lost the Semi Final Match... Disappointing I know, but I suppose not surprising. The Chaos Dwarves of the Uncle Crusty's Circus seem to be specifically trained to Goon Goons... but having said that the circus didn't exactly escape without paying the butcher for their shot at the BABBL Bowl.

I knew that my best shot at winning the game would involve me winning the coin toss... And of course I lost that and the FAME to boot right at the start of the match. I spread out my 3 guys on the line as much as possible in an effort to force the Circus to over commit to knocking the out so I could focus on the ball. The Kick was a Cheering Fans Roll and With The help of the Fan Favourite, Biff Shaterjaws, the Goons took an extra Re-Roll into the half... and as things played out my ST5 BoB was badly hurt right away. Worse was the fact that he didn't even use Claws or mighty blow to do it. The first Block was a Push, the 2nd was a Knock Down, 12 on AV... 10 on injury.

This became a running gag in the match. Rednick would roll AV and it was more often than not a 10+ or in the circumstances where it wasn't... it was less than 6 (preventing Claw/MB from getting me)

Although the fight was already in his favour the Goons set about the CDs like only they can. No injuries were forth coming until Andy Pipkin fouled out the better of the two Bull Centaurs. Despite only badly Hurting him, the Circus were so over confident that they would "Handle" the Goons that they used their only Apo to refresh him for the next drive. This decision would cost the circus later.

The Fight raged with the ball stuck on the wings near the LoS. An opportunity came up for the Goons when Chuck scooped up the Ball in the TZ of the Circus Minotaur and took the risky decision to stand on the Sideline with it. As a result, the Goons managed to stun the Mooing Monster, and later foul him off the pitch. BUT... Although the gamble of standing on the sideline assisted in eliminating the Minotaur from the game, the coverage to protect Chuck was a little too weak and he was blitzed off the pitch. The ball sailed towards the centre of the LoS and after a little push and shove a Hobgoblin got it and was away.

The Goons managed a Kill on the Circus MVP (from the cruel hands of Biff himself) the Hobgoblin Freaky died in Agony, screaming his dying breath as each and every organ in his body failed. (even his brain and hair protested another moment in the living world)... but the Re-roll that Biff used to achieve his greedy work was needed in the next action and a dreaded double skulls saw the Circus off toward the end zone.

The Goons were just too far out of position to affect the run despite the Hobgoblin tripping on his way to the end zone.

The Goons were suffering at the Dwarves hands but were resolute to continue to keep up pressure. Both teams were at equal strength with 12 available bodies. The Goons tried to set up a One turn effort but a miraculous kick sent the ball too far from the Goblin to allow it. the Kick off result came up with Throw a Rock and thanks to Biff being a Fan Favourite, the crowds favour was on his side. A Bloodwieser can loaded with ball bearings rocketed onto the pitch and caught the Veteran Bull centaur off guard... His resultant Brain haemorrhage was lethal and he whispered the name of his killer as he died hours later... "Piniata Head..."

Not to be over shadowed, the Circus ripped the head off the Goons Troll Swamp Donkey. The sadistic dwarves used it as a puppet for the remainder of the game... laughing wildly as they taunted the Goons with the sickening display. The laughter died away though when the headless corpse stood and walked unassisted not to the injury bin, but the reserves bench. So it appears to be true... The Donk was too stupid to realise he had died.

Another casualty on the LoS by Dr. Maddvibe brought the advantage to the Goons Favour for the kick off at the start of the 2nd. The Goons tried as they might to power off the Chaos Dwarves but Nuffle was on Crusty's side once again. He managed a near fatal hit on Biff after cleaning up his fair share of Orcs... The Apoth finally managed to earn his pay, perhaps to frightened of what could happen if he didn't resurrect the BABBL star.

Dr. Maddvibe pulled out all the stops and despite being ganged up and out numbered... Knocked down almost every turn... he blitzed and dodged his way to the end zone in turn 14. Although his season has been overshadowed by the likes of Biff and Busta, the team captain showed why he holds that title through the tenacity of his painful advance to tie the Semifinal game... Perhaps the Goons could force the game into Overtime? Perhaps a lucky Blitz or hot run through the Circus's side would bail the Goons out of a very tough game!

With only 7 players to field against the Circus's 10, it wasn't ever going to be pretty. The Goons fielded a good screen but the Circus had the bodies and the Re-rolls to march one in to the endzone.

At the end of the game Biff, Brick and Maddvibe gazed upon the pitch... The game was tough and didn't go their way, but at least the pressure was on all game. Each turn involved a tough roll for the Circus as they tried to advance to the BABBL finals for the 2nd year in a row. The three Blitzers turned to look towards the reserves box and saw Busta icing his creaky knees... Busta gave them the thumbs up that despite the painful injuries, and needing the Wandering Apothecary to help him, he'd be ready to play next game.

"Maybe next season, eh?" Said Brick
"F**king eh! We'll kill 'em all!" Biff replied.
"Hey, why don't we see if we can cram Dickie into the Donk's neck hole!" Maddvibe drew a booming laugh from the lads and they chased the Snotling around the dugout before 'The Bulk' burst forth and raged in protest.

~//~

The Goons lost their shot at the BABBL Bowl, but at least it cost them less than the Circus. Ricky Wallopnuts was injured again suffering a -AV. Added to the -MA he was just not worth keeping on the payroll. The Donk managed to learn a 2nd skill but as it wasn't Block, he was also released from the Payroll in hopes a fresh rookie would be able to instil some new life to the Goons LoS.

I Purchased a Black Orc (The Fyulaba Kid) and a New Troll (Spazmodious) and looked at the 3rd final game as not a failure to reach BABBL's lofty heights, but a chance to complete all my season goals. 3rd place isn't as high as I wanted to finish but it is still better than every other attempt I've had at a finals run!

The Circus lost their veteran Bull Centaur and also their most experienced player, the Hobgoblin Freaky. There was little doubt that they would still perform well in the finals and Honestly I wished them luck despite the drubbing they handed me. I'll see them for sure in Season V and revenge will be mine!

Season IV isn't quite over yet though... We still have a shot at silver ware and we're going to take that busted thimble home if we have to kill every Norseman in Asgard to do it...

Reason: ''
~ bouf - Find me on Board Game Geek
Or find me on YouTube!
Image
Baduk
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 214
Joined: Thu Mar 19, 2009 1:18 pm

Post by Baduk »

hehehehe....

was worth the wait! n1 and good luck

Reason: ''
User avatar
JaM
Legend
Legend
Posts: 2580
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2004 7:38 pm
Location: The Netherlands.

Post by JaM »

Nice write up, again. Too bad you didnt make the finals, but you gave them hell. Thumbs up ! :D

Dont stop these writings, they are very fun to read.

Is there a place where we can see the whole team, pictured ? :)

Reason: ''
Image
User avatar
bouf
Friend of Bumblef**k
Posts: 1198
Joined: Sun Feb 04, 2007 7:56 am
Location: Brisbane
Contact:

Post by bouf »

Long Time No Blog!

Well, I have to apologise for not staying on the ball with the 'ol Blog... But really there isn't much to report from the last match. The Asgard Raiders were simply schooled in the art of eating turf. If The Goons rolled this well against the Crusty Circus, I would have made it to the finals! On top of that the Raiders just couldn't get a trick. The amount of fail was simply epic! Combined, it was an embarrassing thing to watch.

But despite the Low lights of my High Lights let me spell out how the match went...

Goons receive, Smash Norse to death... Half. Goons up 1-0
Raiders receive, panicked dash and escape. 1-1, Goons receive and Smash Norse to death. 2-1. Raiders receive again and Goons almost Score again... Game

The Goons lost out on the 3rd TD because We simply had to foul the last guy on the pitch! Of course it was Biff and of course he was ejected!!! There was a larger moral Victory here as Greedy Smurf has relished the upper hand in the Fight stakes because in BABBL's Pre-website days, his Norse had my Ogres truly beaten and in the Final turn I elected to keep them on their backs rather that Stand them up for another beating. Well, Well, Well... How the table has turned here my old mate!!! This time it was Greedy who left his players on their backs for not one but two turns! The fear and trepidation of facing another beating was simply too much for the cowardly Norsemen, and rightly so!

Poor Biff failed to grab himself a casualty all game and that was truly a shame. He has ended 1 SPP behind the Leagues most experienced player... One Casualty would have made him the leagues best! but Oh Well. He is still the Leagues Best Player even if that solitary SPP begs to differ

So The Goon Squad has walked to an easy win and I have finally taken home some of the BABBL silverware! Every single Season Objective has been met and I'm so Happy with my Orcs that I've decided to Run them again in Season V of BABBL, despite my Slann Team starting to nag at the edges of my sanity. I think that Season's VI and VII will be all Slann. So please Goon Fans, Get your fill as this may be the last time in a long time. They may even be retired (hopefully as BABBL champions)

So where does that leave the Goons now?
Well the BABBL killing machine, Biff Shatterjaws, has set an avalanche or record breaking achievements. Lets just pat myself on the back now, eh? Most SPPs in a Season, Most Kills (in a single season and of all time), Most Casualties (in a single season and of all time), first player to get 100 SPPs in a single season, First Player to win Back to back medals, First player to get three medals in a single season, Fastest Rise to Legend status, First Orc to reach Legend Status, Leagues highest Bounty, 4th BABBL player to reach Legend Status, First player to get inducted into the BABBL Hall of Fame... Biff is the Man! Just... just... AWESOME!

How do we look for next season? Well we lost the Troll and a BoB right at the end there... That leaves a minor hole in the Defence but it shouldn't be that bad for my offence. With a little luck they'll get some quick Skills and that hole will be smaller that anticipated. The Goons look to be going into a Real Fighting Division With all teams upwards to 2mil+ in Value and the division will be rife with Claws. CDs, Nurgle, Three Chaos Teams and a Snow Troll... I hate to say it but like it or not, the Goons may HAVE to retire. They'll be giving the season a Red Hot Go and with a little luck, they'll finish High and Perhaps take the Gold!

Next Season will see a lot of changes to the league structure as we shift from an Open Challenge system to the a Structured Schedule system. That's not all either... we're also running a shorter season - Dropping the number of regulation games from 16 to 12 - and also there will be fewer league points on offer - dropping from a 3-2-1 system to a 2-1-0. Every point will really count and each loss I can hand out will hold even greater impact. How will the Goons handle these Changes?

I'll get into that next Blog...

Reason: ''
~ bouf - Find me on Board Game Geek
Or find me on YouTube!
Image
User avatar
mattgslater
King of Comedy
Posts: 7758
Joined: Thu Dec 15, 2005 5:18 pm
Location: Far to the west, across the great desert, in the fabled Land of Comedy

Post by mattgslater »

Good luck, Biff!

Reason: ''
What is Nuffle's view? Through a window, two-by-three. He peers through snake eyes.
What is Nuffle's lawn? Inches, squares, and tackle zones: Reddened blades of grass.
What is Nuffle's tree? Risk its trunk, space the branches. Touchdowns are its fruit.
Mad Mö
Experienced
Experienced
Posts: 68
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2009 4:33 pm

Post by Mad Mö »

WOOT???!!!
Da best Ork team of de south half of this clay ball lost their first match against Uncle Crusty (again!)
Get your stuff together the fans (me) are expecting the Goons in the finals.
Greetings from the north half.
Mad Mö

Reason: ''
stashman
Ex-Mega Star, now just a Super Star
Ex-Mega Star, now just a Super Star
Posts: 1611
Joined: Tue Mar 15, 2005 12:12 am

Post by stashman »

What's with the boyz?!

Da Goons have only 1 point in 2 games! Shape up! We belive in Da Goons! :lol:

Reason: ''
Post Reply